sometimes i wonder.

i wonder what kind of plans does God has for me? i know that my days are numbered according to His will for me, but sometimes i feel lost. emo. emo is the word.

like how i managed to pass my o levels and how i managed to not want to go to a junior college and my mum didnt raise any objections. i got into the design school without any talent or skills or even the basic ability to draw, plus a screwed up interview. cheeyong was really really scary. and i managed to stay put till now. three long years. i remembered the day of the interview. they screwed up the time, i had to wait an hour for it. i was wearing my blue op shirt. hahs.

how i managed to find out that i didnt really make a lot of friends in crescent. and i began to distant myself from some people. and i didnt really like speaking anymore. i could crap a lot still. then i realise that i need a lot of time to think of what i want to say, unless you want crap. crap is easy. but i like listening. something i couldnt manage in the past. i am a good listener. but i cant really respond fast. cos i need a lot of time to think. hahs.

i am emo.
hahahshhahas.

plus i am quite stupid. i totally missed the date for parson's application dateline.
loser me. hahs.

i think i got a nice handwriting now. i am writing in cursive. it feels pretty. if you want, give me your address, i will write you a letter.

(:

and then i wonder, can people can go *poof and disappear? i cant find you* anymore.